Maggie's Birth Story: My Second Marathon

I've written a lot of birth stories, but this one is my own. It's my account of my experience of the marathon of a labor and birth of my baby girl, Margaret Eva.

Saturday, December 5th

The contractions, which had previously been just Braxton Hicks, seemed to be coming more regularly and getting more and more consistent. I got excited. Don and I were at a beautiful Puja ceremony which seemed like a perfect way to start my labor journey. But later that evening, things slowed down. That night, I snuggled up with Don and slept a solid 6 hours. Since I hadn't been sleeping well in the week leading up to this point, this solid stretch of sleep ended up being a life saver later on.

Sunday, December 6th

When I woke up Sunday morning, contractions started almost immediately. They were 3 minutes apart and I noticed quickly they felt different, stronger and they happened in more of a consistent pattern. I felt this was finally the real thing! Don and I ran a few errands, took Piney to the park, made birthday cupcakes for baby, and enjoyed early labor. We stayed in touch with our doula and midwife all day. We agreed to meet the midwife at 7pm at the hospital to check in and see what was happening. As we were leaving for the hospital, I felt I was leaving too soon, but didn't listen to my instincts. I let my curiosity get the best of me and off to the hospital we went.

I was 3 cm and 80% effaced when we arrived. Even though I knew this was probably our fate, I was disappointed. We thought we would just go home but unfortunately I had a high blood pressure reading and was medically advised to stay. We set up shop in the labor room. My mom came to join us. My best friend and her husband came to bring us some dinner and their love & encouragement which lifted our spirits up. Labor continued as we walked the hallways, used the birth ball for different positions and I continued to try to relax.

Monday, December 7th

Our doula came around 2am. We were happy to see her, knowing she could help support our efforts of getting things moving. Side note: My doula was someone who I took my doula training with in 2008. I ran into her a couple of years ago and after a brief chat, I told her that when I get pregnant, I'd love to have her as my doula. And here we were.

As we continued to labor through the night, the cx were getting stronger. At around 6:30am, the midwife checked me and announced I was still 3cm. After laboring for 24 hours, I was only 3cm. I thought HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE!?! I completely lost it. I sobbed like a baby in Don's arms. So many self-doubting thoughts raced through my head: "My labor isn't progressing?!?!" "Why is this happening to me?" "Yes of course, this WOULD happen to me!" "Just give me a C-section because that's how these type of labors end!!" "Okay, just get a C-section and be fine with it"

After my necessary meltdown and much encouragement from my birth team, I was ready to just keep trucking on, to try to keep the labor going. But, by 3pm things seemed to be slowing down, and almost completely stopped. At this point, my doula and midwife pulled out all their tricks: nipple stimulation with the breast pump, acupuncture, even an enema which I completely resisted (it wasn't that bad). When the midwife checked me again at around 5pm, I was 5cm. Yay! It's working! She offered to break my water at that point too, which I was open to. When she broke my water, I felt SUCH relief from the constant feeling of extreme tightness I felt in my belly for the past month. Turns out I had a LOT of amniotic fluid in there.

After that, the contractions got way more intense and when the midwife checked me a few hours later, I was still 5cm! My body was messing with me. Come on! How?? I thought. The midwife suggested I labor in a specific position for a while, because there was something stopping my cervix from opening. So I labored in a modified hands and knees position for about an hour. Things were really picking up. She checked me at 9:30pm and low and behold, I was 6-7 cm! TUB TIME! Finally!! This came at the perfect time, I was starting to feel that soon I would be unable to cope if I couldn't get in the tub because the cx were so intense and I was utterly exhausted and sick of hearing discouraging cervical progress reports.

The team packed our bags and moved over to the birthing center. I couldn't get in that tub quick enough. When I got in, I immediately felt a sense of relief and relaxation although I am sure it didn't sound that way. I was moaning so loudly, like an animal in the wild. It was the only way I could cope and everyone in the room kept saying "good.." "that's it".

I started to push around 11:30pm, and I remember everyone saying "this baby is going to be born right on her due date!" which was the next day, December 8th.

Tuesday, December 8th

Pushing felt great. It felt right and gave me relief. I pushed for an hour before I was told that baby had too many heart rate decels, and that I needed to get out of the tub. At that point, I didn't care, I just wanted to meet my baby! I got in the bed right next to the tub and spent the next hour pushing her out with lots of encouragement (and NO COUNTING!) from my team. Her head was born with her little hand right next to it. The rest of her was born at 1:26am and she was placed directly on my chest. Sweet, sweet relief. The best. Everything I pictured - a perfect little baby at the end of the marathon. She was placed face down, so we couldn't see if she was a boy or girl. Frankly, neither Don nor I cared. We didn't even look at first. Finally after a few minutes, they flipped her over so Don could take a look. It took him a few seconds to announce it because he was in shock at what he didn't find (he was sure it was a boy the whole pregnancy). It was a girl! A beautiful, perfect daughter.

My mom sobbed happy tears, and Don and I just looked at each other in disbelief. Margaret Eva was here, we were elated. It was the most joyful moment of my life.

Maggie's birth taught me many things. Going in, I thought I had a great plan: trust my body, and it will all work out. Turns out that wasn't that far from the truth. But actually trusting my body was the hard part. Luckily I had the most amazing, supportive team at my side, to help me get through the hard parts when self doubt and fear crept in.

The lessons I learned from Maggie's birth continue to arise as I process different moments from the entire labor. It was truly an eye-opening experience in so many ways. I had witnessed 40 childbirths before my own. Each one helped me prepare but nothing could have prepared me fully. Birth is a unique experience each woman goes through each time she bears a child. My journey was what I needed and nothing more. It was perfectly imperfect and has made me appreciate the process of pregnancy and birth as a right of passage into motherhood more than I already had.