Heart Strength

Heart Strength
Ben's Birth
April 15, 2009
12:56 p.m.
7 lbs, 13 oz, 19 inches

When I woke up to a phone call at 2:20 a.m. on Wednesday morning, I thought it must be a wrong number or a call from a friend in Hawaii forgetting about the time difference. But, it was Tom King, one of my dads-to-be. I was immediately awake. He explained that Mary’s water had broken and that they would be heading to the hospital to be checked out. I put on my game face because I knew that it had the potential of becoming a long night/day. I had been excited about Mary and Tom’s birth since the day I met them. They seemed like such a great couple, excited about their labor and delivery, and to become parents. So when I talked to Tom early that morning, I told him to call me after they got settled at the hospital to let me know if it was really labor or not. But a few minutes after I hung up with him, I felt something telling me it might really be labor, and that I, too, should go to the hospital. I got ready and took off at 3 a.m. It was raining buckets and just nasty out so I took my time driving. When I arrived at Stamford Hospital at 3:50, Mary and Tom had just arrived. I met them in their room. They seemed excited about the possibility that this was it, and I shared their excitement. Nurse Jane came in and gave us the low down – no food, no water, no birth plan, no nothing. This was a little disconcerting but Mary and Tom remained calm and took the news as best as they could. Mary explained to the nurse that she and Tom were very open, and that these were more “birthing preferences” than a plan. Nurse Jane replied that she liked the term birthing preferences more than birth plan because in her experience, one can never plan a birth! We got comfortable because Mary’s contractions had begun to pick up and after the resident doctor checked her, she knew it was real labor.

Time passed fairly quickly, and Mary’s contractions came frequently and were increasingly stronger. Mary took deep breaths through each one and managed quite nicely. I watched Mary and Tom take one contraction at a time. It was a beautiful sight, to see the love, compassion and friendship that they share. All the while, their little baby’s mighty heart kept beating strong, on and on. At 7 a.m., it was time for shift change, and so we got a new nurse, Jen. She was very kind and seemed to bring a new positive light to the room. Mary took a shower with her supportive husband by her side, which seemed like a relaxing and helpful option for pain relief at that time. When the doctor checked Mary after the shower, she was 4 centimeters dilated and definitely on her way. She was beginning to feel a bit uncomfortable and slightly weak. At that point, Mary decided to get an epidural because she felt it might bring her some relief and a chance to nap and hopefully re-fuel. Almost immediately after the epidural was in place, the doctor announced that Mary was already 6 centimeters! We all got excited, knowing that she was making such great progress. She remained strong, despite her feelings of sleepiness and nausea. The epidural brought on some relief, but that only lasted about an hour. Mary was still pretty uncomfortable so the doctor decided to check her again. He gave us the news that she was 10 centimeters dilated! We were all in shock! Mary seemed happy but very surprised that she went from 6 to 10 centimeters in only one hour, and pushing seemed like the furthest thing from her mind. We tried to encourage her, knowing that she could do it. Her baby was ready, and she just needed a little encouragement before she discovered that deep inner heart strength that would help her do what she was meant to.

It only took a few pushes for Mary to whip out her hidden power. It was unbelievably moving to see someone transform this way. Mary stunned everyone, including the nurses and doctors, with her might. She took advantage of every contraction, using them to move her baby down. Mary kept a positive attitude for the entire two hours that she pushed, which surely contributed to her efficiency. Tom cheered her on, every step of the way, making sure she knew how proud he was of her hard work to deliver their baby. At 12:56 p.m. on Wednesday, April 15, 2009, Mary gave a final push and delivered her son, Ben. Mary immediately embraced her baby boy, showering him with love and kisses. The feelings of love between Mary, Tom and little Ben radiated throughout the room. I had the chance to take some pictures, in an attempt to capture this truly beautiful moment. Ben stayed snuggled close against his mommy, and breastfed perfectly. Dad stood next to his wife, watching her cuddle with his son. These are the best moments in life. I could feel this new family’s heart strength.

Tom’s parents were waiting anxiously in the lobby, waiting to meet their first grandchild. When they came into the room, I saw their faces light up. They explained how amazing and unreal it was to have a grandson. Tom’s mom even said “I have been waiting for this moment since Thomas was born.” After they were settled, I left Tom, Mary, and Ben because it was time for them to bond and rest after a long night and day of hard work. I left feeling lucky to be a part of something as real as this birth.